(no subject)

[nny]

So.

I was wondering.

What's sex like?

Genuine question- I'd really be interested in getting as many responses as possible. And I don't really care what form the responses take... small stories, train of thought, drabbles, smut... whatever the subject makes you think of.

Feel free to post anonymously. The IP whatever logging thing is off, not that I'd know how to use it anyway. =)

Indulge me. *g*

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Sex is...

...surprisingly good.

If it's with the right person.

Now, I'm not talking about your One True Love (blech), or waiting until you're married (double-blech). I'm talking about someone you feel pretty comfortable with, someone you like, someone you won't be embarrassed saying, "For God's sake, go lower!" to.

I was eighteen when I had sex for the first time, and it was a hell of lot better than I thought it was going to be. I'd been reading smut for years and years, and my tastes in reading had been getting pretty...complex. So I wasn't expecting plain ol' vanilla sex to be so gosh-darned exciting in real life. *grin*

And so I'll present:

Things I Learned My (Heterosexual) First Time

#1. Lube is a virgin's best friend.

#2. Guys' expectations aren't as sophisticated as smutty fic leads one to believe. Confidence is easy to fake, and besides, everyone fumbles a little. Things can get a little awkward - one might, say, end up getting elbowed in a place one never expected to be elbowed, but it's all right if you're with someone you can giggle with about it. Natural instinct really takes over, and as long as you don't let yourself stop and think about how stupid the face you're making must look like, things generally proceed well enough.

#2. Oral sex: mankind's greatest invention. Receiving it - fantabulous, like birthday and Christmas combined. Knowing you're good at giving it (and it's really not as hard as it looks, no pun intended) - an ego boost that will carry you throughout the rest of the day.

#3. Guys become a little stupid when confronted with the possibility of sex. This means that they honestly don't notice the cellulite on your butt, or the fact that you haven't shaved your legs in three weeks. They're getting laid. This blinds them to all else.

#4. Sex is surprisingly squishy. There will be squelchy noises throughout the entire proceeding. Again, as long as you don't stop to think about it too much, you may refrain from giggling.

#5. Bigger is not better. A guy whose equipment is roughly the size of your forearm might not, upon reflection, be the best choice for a first time. However, sex is equally about your partner's needs, so see #1.

#6. Sex is a lot easier than this certain rather shy, bitter, misanthrope suspected. Being naked in front of another person (in more ways than one) isn't so bad after all, because they're naked too, and you get an orgasm besides. Everything goes better with orgasms.

So, in conclusion. Sex = Funny, Scary, Exciting, Comforting, Awkward, Rhythmic, and most of all, Squishy.