(no subject)

[nny]

Well that was certainly an interesting experiment. *shakes head*.

I had absolutely no idea at all that it would become quite so huge as it did. I thought I'd get, at most, 20 comments. I was boogying around the room in delight when I hit 69. (Plus, all the obvious immature reasons for delighting at 69, naturally). Then I went to bed. Then I woke up the next day, and found over 300 replies in my inbox.

O.O

Wow. I've had mutual love fests, stalkers, arguments, CAPSLOCKS, ::)))) smileys ^_^, exchanges of IMs, sweetness, weirdness. I've only had one response that I had to delete, which I'm glad of. I've had people that have put their own names down. Yes. I can tell. *patpat* I've learned a lot more about the personal policies that people have in regards to friending, and I confess I'm never going to understand some of it. I mean, not friending someone because you admire them too much? Or 'cos you're afraid they won't friend you back? I'm afraid I don't see it. I have had people friended for months, and it really doesn't concern me that they haven't listed me back.

Anyone I know well, talk to, care about, has me friended. I know that I can read their friendslocked posts, and if I can't then I understand it's something that doesn't concern me. Likewise, in real life- I wouldn't be offended if a friend told someone else a secret but not me. I'd just assume they had a different relationship. *shrugs* Nor am I going to get pissed off if people de-friend me, since if they are someone I particularly care about I would imagine I'd already know the reason why, and anyone else I completely understand that I might not be to your tastes.

I'm not saying that I don't want people to friend me. I love it. I think it's absolutely grand that people might want to read what I have to say, the (ridiculously infrequent) snippets and ficlets I post. But I won't guarantee that I'll friend you back.

The main reason for this? I'm slack. I really am. It's not like I really f-lock anything anyway. I have friendslocked maybe... two posts in the past month, and that was because they were of no interest to anyone but myself, and I didn't want to be accused of manipulating for sympathy.

I should take a look through my friends-of list more often, I guess. Remind me. *g*

Anyway, back to the crush meme. I didn't mean for it to get quite as elitist as it did. And... I dunno. People posting comments about the fact that they hadn't got any crushes was weird... I mean, my journal is a random place. Most of the people posting were people I'd never seen before, and will likely never see again. Maybe the people that like you hadn't *seen* the meme?

Now it's spawned the hate meme, which I'm not going to link to because I don't think it's a particularly good thing. It looks like it was started tongue-in-cheek, but it's now become genuinely nasty, and I don't think that's fair. The weird part is that people seem to be so *well* *informed* about the people they dislike, which would indicate to me that they still read their journals, or have them on their friendslist. Simple solution? You don't like someone, you don't read them. Is this just me?

There was one comment on the crush post that I found a little bit hurtful, which mentioned clique-yness and such. My response to this? You can't resent someone for not friending you or talking to you if *you haven't spoken to them*. People will not spontaneously bow down to the power that is you. I am sure you *are* grand, but you can't sit in a corner and hope that your grandness will just shine through. Say hi! Be friendly! No one on the internet is better than you. They may be a talented writer or artist, they may be particularly well known or have a large friendslist, but they are all people. The way that people will treat you rests largely on the way that you treat them. If you go into a friendship telling someone that they are better than you, that you don't deserve to be friends with them, you can't blame them if they agree. *shrugs* Just be you.

Anyone have anything to add?

Comments

[atdelphi.livejournal.com]

Anyone have anything to add?

*cough*

Only that if I'd known how huge it was going to get, I wouldn't have made three separate entries on the first page, expressing my love 'n admiration for Jeddy, Switchknife, and Ellen Fremedon.

*sheepish grin*

[villainny.livejournal.com]

lol

'sokay. I forgive you. And... You don't love *ME*?!

*weeps, piteously*

[atdelphi.livejournal.com]

Aww...

But I love you in a sisterly way! We're too much alike - it would never work out :-P

[villainny.livejournal.com]

*snickers*

A sisterly way, you say?

Wow. You so don't have siblings like I do.

...

Or you might. And you might want to kill me...

O.O

[atdelphi.livejournal.com]

Hm...that's a good point. I haven't talked to my sister in years, and the last time I saw her she had just thrown a bunch of my friends' shoes into the driveway and was backing over them with the car.

I'll amend that to, I love you in a Nny-like way :-)

[villainny.livejournal.com]

And I love you in a Delphi like way.

*hugs*

You rock, kid.

[ygrane.livejournal.com]

Good, because she's mine anyway. ^_~

[melpemone.livejournal.com]

Did the meme get elitist? Does the fact that I didn't notice make me elitist myself? :)

The whole point of the meme was to spread around some love (and somnieperus replied to me, and I could have died of teh happy. I love that meme. :D), and it sure succeeded. It was a beautiful moment in fandom, congrats. :)

I know people are weird about some other people online. To use my own example, when I first got an LJ, the first thing I did was friend somniesperus (whom I was loving from afar at the time), and then I fretted about being seen as presumptuous. Of course, I've learned now, but at first... I guess I can sort of see why some people are a bit frightened to friend others - it calls attention to themselves, and some people are insecure enough about it to worry that they might not be good enough. That kind of insecurity can lead to anger - they might perceive their crushee (for want of a better word) as the source of their feelings about themselves, and start resenting them for it. Which is all very irrational, but hey, people are strange. :)

Thus ends my amateur psychology moment of the day. ::grins::

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Wow. I never really saw it like that.

I'm clearly big with the empathy. *g*

Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed the crush meme. It's reassuring to hear that. =)

[lyricalnights.livejournal.com]

Bah, I wouldn't fret too much about the hate meme. They claimed your crush post as an origin, but I know I've seen it at least once before, and it's just boredom and spite.

Neither of which I actively condemn, in the proper proportion, honestly, but things are ugly over there, aren't they? I hate that people are upset about it, cause I don't think it's worth noticing, but emotions don't really work that way, sadly.

Anywho, the crush meme rocked, much like you. ;)

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Well I'm glad it's not my fault. Also, faintly distressed that so many people are bouncing around on the hate meme... but I'm just ignoring it. Easier that way. *g*

And thankee-sai. You're not so bad yourself, love. ;)

[lyricalnights.livejournal.com]

Ignoring teh hate is generally the safest and sanest way to go. =)

[vimeslady.livejournal.com]

If the crush meme got elitist, does that make me 'not in the in group' or actually super-elitist, since I didn't participate at all? Looked at the topic, considered that I can't think of anyone in LJ (or anywhere else in cyberspace, for that matter) that I have ever had a crush on, couldn't imagine anyone in LJ having a crush on me, and just sort of forgot about it. Not to mention it came along while I was busy having personal crises.

Anyway, I thought I should at least congratulate you on getting such a gigantic response.

I agree with everything you said about friending people. Very well said and thought out.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

No, it makes you sensible. Not that the people who did *aren't* sensible, but there *was* quite a bit of sillyness here and there. I guess it's inevitable. To see who I'm interested in you just have to take a look at my friendslist. *g*

[laurelwood.livejournal.com]

Likewise, in real life- I wouldn't be offended if a friend told someone else a secret but not me. I'd just assume they had a different relationship. *shrugs*

I aspire to be this mature one of these days. :)

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Your icon rocks my socks. Just had to say.

*spams Nny's journal mercilessly*

[villainny.livejournal.com]

*hands you tin of luncheon meat*

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Well, it works in *principle*... Hee. Nah- I have actually not got that many close friends in RL, and those that *are* I know would tell me anything. And frequently do, in spite of my efforts to escape, cover my ears, close my eyes... Anyone else can tell me things if they want, and if they don't I'm perfectly happy to sit and talk music with them for hours. *g*

[ladyjosephine1.livejournal.com]

I didn't notice anything elitist on the crush post. But then again, I only was skimming to see if any one crushes on me. *g*

Hate meme? One would think that we could all learn to be mature, but alas! LJ turns into a playpen once again. I don't know where it's at and I don't think I'd even want to see it. I can already imagine how hateful it's getting.

And werd with what you said about your friending policy. People shouldn't be so hurt if they're not friended back. Over-sensitivity seems to be a problem in LJ land.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Over-sensitivity seems to be a problem in LJ land.

It really does, doesn't it? I very rarely get offended by things people say in RL, let alone people I'm never going to meet. I've never understood all the fandom_wank type stuff.

[mimine.livejournal.com]

I'll just say that it was a lovely meme and the only reason there were reactions like that was that it got so successful. You certainly didn't do anything wrong.

I'll also say that you have a very healthy attitude towards friending and de-friending. *crushes*

And that thing I told you about in chat? All resolved now. Thanks for the moral support, you're grand!

[villainny.livejournal.com]

*preens* Yes, I know I'm grand. I'm glad it's worked itself out.

Cheers for the support on the crush meme.

[toujoursimpur.livejournal.com]

I would say the hate meme had one good effect, which was that people on my flist linked it and it had a link here, so I got to see the wonderfully engaging crush meme that I otherwise wouldn't have seen. :)

You don't like someone, you don't read them. Is this just me?

My thoughts /exactly/.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Hee, that's good. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Also glad you agreed on the friending/defriending thing. Keeping someone you dislike on your f-list is a very strange form of masochism, it seems to me.

[thedivinegoat.livejournal.com]

You don't like someone, you don't read them. Is this just me?

No, not just you.

Someone was ranting about an "ugly" icon always being on their friends list, and how much they hated that person.

All I was thinking, was why not remove them from you're friends list then? Have they hacked your journal so you can't? 'cos I think abuse would do something about that. Otherwise, don't read their journal!

Simple really.

PS I'm friending you, purely because I want to read your journal. Please do not feel under any pressure to reciprocate, especially as I have very little to say.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

It's nice to have you here, kid. Hi!

[ex-applepip650.livejournal.com]

There are quite honestly no words for how much I loved this meme :x :x :x THANKYOU <33333333333

[darth-stitch.livejournal.com]

I loved that "crush" meme. It was funny as all hell...'specially with the one who wanted to have switchknife's "knuman babies."

*grin*

I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised and of course, flattered, to find that I made it there. Goodness! *blush* (don't mind me, my inner Minerva McGonagall is showing again)

As for the hate meme, which I haven't seen and was wondering about previously, I'm going to take Lars' advice and not go look for it. Ignorance is bliss and I shall remain quite happily blissful. Mweh.

[shadafakup.livejournal.com]

Your icons.

I mean YOUR ICONS.

I MEAN YOUR FUCKING ICONS.

Don't ask me why, I never did bother to reply to that crush thread. Hate meme? Sounds odd. And I supposed its not publicized, which is why I didn't know of it.

BUT YOUR ICONS.

JTHM pawns my arse.

Er yeah. I'm not going to randomly friend you. BUT YOUR ICONS.

~Shadafakup
P.S. I suppose you might consider this spam.

~Shadafakup

[villainny.livejournal.com]

You, m'dear, are welcome to nick any of the JTHM, Squee or I feel sick ones. I'm glad you like them. =)

And nah. Not spam. Always glad to hear my work is appreciated. *g*

[shadafakup.livejournal.com]

I don't have a paid account, so it wouldn't make a difference except extra 10 mins everytime I get on the com to cackle at them.

!SQUEE! You have to love him. For curiousity sake, do you read Lenore?

And lol. Ok *continues to spam*

You probably might not like me or anything, but I'll just add you because

YOUR FUCKING ICONS.

Its hillarious, because they actually resemble "mood" icons.

~Shadafakup

[villainny.livejournal.com]

I haven't read Lenore yet, though I keep meaning to get around to it. I love the T-shirts by Roman Dirge, and have a weird book of poetry by him called "Something at the Window is Scratching" which made me laugh a hell of a lot. *g*

And yes. I have waaaaaay too many icons. And spent entirely too much time making both them and the actual mood icon set I'm using, too.

A paid account is a beautiful thing... =)

[shadafakup.livejournal.com]

Lenore is disturbingly cute. I mean, how hard is it to love a little dead girl who throws knives and burns her little dead boyfriend while dancing ballet with her dead kitten during funerals.

Poetry? That I have to see. I haven't seen it around in bookstores. Then again, where I'm at, they ban a whole lot of shit, so BLAH.

Well, time is something we people who live online have a lot of so go ahead, people like me drool at them all the time.

And yes. *kicks you and tries to steal your icon*

*returns with a sore bum and nothing else*

I have no online credit cards and whatnot so =(

~Shadafakup