(no subject)

[nny]

Stolen from bravecows:

Tell me: What's it like to be you?

Comments

[darthrami.livejournal.com]

Confusing.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

*steeples fingers, a lá Vetinari*

Tell me more. *g*

[darthrami.livejournal.com]

:-p

Well, my brain has never worked in a very linear way, and as I've gotten older (ahahahahaha, yes, I realize how young I still am), it's only gotten worse and worse. And sometimes it feels like I'm not even sure what's going on up there. University kicked most of the knowlege that I had and was proud of out, and replaced it with stuff that I can't remember or care nothing about remembering, and so I don't, and instead, it feels empty. Where I used to get confused by the myriad voices in my head, shouting to drown each other out, now it can be silence just as often. I forget words a lot, and forget things and activities even more. I find myself going to say something and it'll be a complete blank - confusing.

And I hate that, and now I run away in embarrassment.

[indy-go.livejournal.com]

Um. A bit like waiting for the other shoe to drop, really.

As in...what if I screw up? What if people realize I'm not what they imagined me to be? I'm not that smart, so how did I get into that school? Get that internship? How long until it all goes to pot?

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Trust me when I say I know that feeling. I feel like a fraud, most of the time, and I'm terrified of being found out.

[sophistry]

*joins the club*

[indy-go.livejournal.com]

*sighs* The unfortunate thing is that I am very optimistic when it comes to other people, and not so much when it comes to myself.

[museofswearing.livejournal.com]

Like walking a tightrope.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

Over what? How high up?

[museofswearing.livejournal.com]

It's not so much what it's over, per se, as just it being there. Sometimes I look ahead of me and I see the sky and it's so beautiful, it's like you're flying, and I'm never happier. And sometimes I look below me and there's so far to fall, and one half-step the wrong way means it's all over.

[sophistry]

Insulated. Like there's a very thick layer of cotton wool between myself and the rest of the world.

[villainny.livejournal.com]

I know that feeling. Very much know that feeling. Bubblewrap around the brain. *g*

[sophistry]

There's just... a sense of detachment, a lot of the time. So many things I can't be arsed about. Like, I abhor failing things, and yet I just can't bring myself to study. I know I should spend more time with my family, but I just don't really feel like it. I know I should probably go out more often, and socialise, but I'm just happier on my own, for the most part. There's just a great big 'why bother?' sign hanging on my brain.

[friede.livejournal.com]

Lovely... all in all, a charmed life. Even when it all goes pear-shaped, I'm learning. And I've been surrounded with love and support every step of the way.

To quote one of my favourite books, "I am in Love, and out of it I will not go."

[wickedtrue.livejournal.com]

Strange. Very strange. Like teapots floating in the sky while pouring out lemonade on the unsuspecting masses of swaying white daisies. What's worse is the teapot has a pink dancing bunny motif.

[rockcandy.livejournal.com]

Usually pretty interesting in a bizarre kind of way.

[minkhollow]

Chaotic, you might call it. I procrastinate like there's all MANNER of tomorrow (example: right now, I could and should be doing my bio research, but noooo), I stick my foot in my mouth from time to time, I can be so direct when people are getting on my nerves that I may have scared off a few potential friends, and I have a very, very, VERY overactive imagination.
However, I like most of that the way it is. I have opinions and I make 'em heard, and I'm having quite a bit of fun with writing, fanfic or RPage or otherwise (the Nano's going quite well). And I'm slowly but surely getting used to talking about fandom with people in real life, which is really quite fun, but... Catholic high school. I was a bit afraid of the reaction if I brought it up there, especially once I got into slash fandom. Didn't stop me from spreading the raw material, though. XD

[tropes.livejournal.com]

Manic cheer covering a swirling maelstrom of panic and despair.

Er. :D!

[randomblade.livejournal.com]

Being me is FUN!

*random person*

[lamiael.livejournal.com]

A cheap TV show.

Very, very cheap. :)

[rimestock.livejournal.com]

Flaily, wonky, and occasionally manky.

On the other hand... sometimes people give me art.

Like Lara. She gave me art! It's pretty:

[schiarire.livejournal.com]

Disgustingly spoilt. Emphasis on disgusting. I should never be allowed to complain about anything ever, and should probably give more away and all.

[ashen_key]

An endless merry-go-round of addiction to being other people, clashes with my parents, loving my parents, retreat into other worlds, the high of crack clinging to friends and worry that everyone will find out that I'm a complusive, selfish liar.

[fahye.livejournal.com]

They asked - what's it like being you? and I replied
It's funny you should ask that - I don't know, I've never tried
'Cause I've been something else now for so very many years
And now I come to give you all my hard and broken tears
You said that you don't love me, won't you say it once again
Oh I can take the lies you told me, I can stand the pain
When I throw myself into the flames, please don't pull me out
Scars and burns from you are things that I can't live without
Now tell me - will you love me then?

Sorry, but as soon as I saw the question I remembered that. Now onto an actual answer -

Lonely. Frustrating. Occasionally very rewarding. Turbulent.

Like an electrical storm in the middle of nowhere.

Like a few too many voices talking at once.

being me

[fer-de-lance.livejournal.com]

Currently? Double-plus ungood. Am currently buried in the depths of academic effort toward a paper I don't want to write, with no time for creative writing and very little (read: nil) accomplished toward The Paper which is nonetheless stealing all my writing time and reading time and fun time and relaxing time. Have six billion academic projects, all seemingly due one after the other and with The Paper I seem to have no time to do more than worry about them. (Yes, I'm afraid this is why my posting lately has been rather rec-and-run.)

Generally speaking, however, it feels both good and confusing. Good, because I have a pretty great life and I know it, and I'm grateful for it. Confusing, because right now (along with The Paper and the Academic Horde) I am supposed to be figuring out what I want to do with the rest of my life, and I just cannot decide. I'm wavering, and indecisive, and just generally feel so pressed by the day-to-day things like papers and projects that there's no time to think about the future--and all too soon it will be here. Random good things, however, even in the midst of this, include: incredibly mild weather, Chinese food, new books should I ever find time to read them, and a trip tomorrow to hear the former Poet Laureate. :D